Raising a strong willed child

Hello Everyone! I am writing this post mostly for myself as lately I am facing some real struggle with my own strong willed son. Years ago I read a book about this topic and I have done a little research for us parents that are struggling from the same. Here you go some good tips to follow:

challenging for sure

First of all Parenting a strong-willed child is challenging to everyone. If you’re parenting a strong-willed child, you have likely at some point entered into a cycle of timeouts or threats of losing privileges. Some parents have fallen down this slippery slope too.


Back before you had kids, you thought it was going to be so easy. Back then, good parenting meant telling kids what to do, and making sure that they actually did it.

feeling guilty

But back then, you had no idea how much guilt you’d feel. And never would you have expected to feel so terrified that every little decision you made might screw your child up for life.

And to add to all that massive mom guilt and fear that you’re royally screwing up your kids, you were blessed with a kid who seems bent on being the poster-child for “stubborn,” “strong-willed” or even “disobedient” behavior.
Nowadays, you realize that parenting is harder than you ever thought it could be and that parenting a strong-willed is way more harder!


Though there are plenty of times when parenting a strong-willed, sometimes disobedient child is a difficult, exhausting endeavor, it turns out there are plenty of benefits to a little bit of naughtiness or disobedience.
The more research that comes forward on these headstrong children, the more we learn that maintaining their spirit is the key to their lifelong success.
In fact, it has been found that their strong-willed nature can lead to a list of positive experiences in life, including strong leadership skills, an entrepreneurial spirit and the potential to earn more in a career than their less spirited counterparts.
But what good does all this future talk do when you feel like you’ll never manage to get there?

How do you survive the now, when every direction turns into a power struggle and you’re spending more time arguing with your kids than enjoying the already limited time you have with them?
Below are some of effective tips on how to raise strong willed children
Follow through on what you say and communicate readily.
Our children need to be able to trust that what we say is what we mean. If they have done wrong, it is important we follow through on discipline. And if plans change, it is important they understand why.

Set Limits With Your Kids

One of the most valuable things I’ve learned about the strong-willed child over the years is that they need to know the why behind almost every command they receive.
This particular characteristic of your child may be the most exhausting. After a full day of work and supper burning on the stove, the last thing you want to do is explain why you had to say “No” to yet another episode of Paw Patrol!
Or explain to your 9-year-old for the hundredth time why she can’t get her own phone yet!

Provide warnings before changing activities or leaving an event.

There are days, or parts of the day, that are less predictable than others. Giving your child a two-minute warning before transitioning from one activity to another. This allows him or her to feel involved in the process and not overtaken by you.

Label their feelings to show you understand even if you don’t agree.

One of the greatest gifts you can give your spirited child is the acknowledgement of how he or she feels. This recognition scaffolds moving forward and creates space to understand the discipline that may follow.

Apologize when you parent out of anger.

Yelling, get mad at their crying, or showing other signs of anger can happen to the best of us. Not only does admitting we’ve done wrong model good behaviour, it also re-establishes trust. Yelling is damaging.

Finally, remember that the strong-willed personality shouldn’t be  away, but cultivated to provide more good in the world. And please always, always remember: your child will achieve strong independence and self-motivation in adulthood if you help him cultivate those skills in childhood through conversation and teaching self-imposed limits, instead of using threats of punishment to break his spirit and encourage blind obedience.

Until next time! see you on my insta!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *